The Saga of my Golf Playiing
Although I love to get out on the course, the lack of quality of my golf game is a serious problem. A good way to describe my game is contained in the top ten things caddies have actually said to me (of course I did NOT tip the bastards - although one time I was so disgusted I gave on my entire bag of clubs - and no the replacements did NOT help one bit)
#10 Golfer: "Think I'm going to drown myself in the lake."
Caddy: "Think you can keep your head down that long?"
#9 Golfer: "I'd move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course."
Caddy: "Try heaven, you've already moved most of the earth."
#8 Golfer: "Do you think my game is improving?"
Caddy: "Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now."
#7 Golfer: "Do you think I can get there with a 5 iron?"
Caddy: "Eventually."
#6 Golfer: "You've got to be the worst caddy in the world."
Caddy: "I don't think so sir. That would be too much of a
coincidence."
#5 Golfer: "Please stop checking your watch all the time. It's too much
of a distraction."
Caddy: "It's not a watch - it's a compass."
#4 Golfer: "How do you like my game?"
Caddy: "Very good sir, but personally, I prefer golf."
#3 Golfer: "Do you think it's a sin to play on Sunday?
Caddy: "The way you play, sir, it's a sin on any day."
#2 Golfer: "This is the worst course I've ever played on."
Caddy: "This isn't the golf course. We left that an hour a go."
and the #1 best caddy comment:
#1 Golfer: "That can't be my ball, it's too old."
Caddy: "It's been a long time since we teed off, sir."
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