a small dose of reality

 

burning.

7:15 P.M. Pledge of allegiance to U.N.

7:30 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.

7:30 - 8:00 P.M. Nonreligious prayer and worship -- Jessie Jackson and Al
Sharpton.

8:00 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.

8:05 P.M. Ceremonial tree hugging.

8:15- 8:30 P.M. Gay Wedding-- Barney Frank Presiding.

8:30 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.

8:35 P.M. Free Saddam Rally -- Cindy Sheehan, Susan Sarandon.

9:00 P.M. Keynote speech. The proper etiquette for surrender--
French President Jacques Chirac

9:15 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.

9:20 P.M. Collection to benefit Osama Bin Laden kidney transplant fund.

9:30 P.M. Unveiling of plan to free freedom fighters from Guantanamo Bay --
Sean Penn.

9:40 P.M. "Why I hate the Military", a short talk by William Jefferson
Clinton.

9:45 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.

9:50 P.M. Dan Rather presented the Truth in Broadcasting award, by Michael
Moore.

9:55 P.M., Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.

10:00 P.M. How George W. Bush and Donald Rumsfeld brought down the World
Trade Center Towers-- Howard Dean.

10:30 P.M. Nomination of Hillary Rodham Clinton by Mahmud Ahmadinejad.

11:00 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.

11:05 P.M. Al Gore reinvents Internet.

11:15 P.M. Our Troops are War criminals-- John Kerry.

11:30 P.M. Coronation Of Ms. Rodham Clinton.

12:00 A.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast

12:05 A.M. Bill asks Ted to drive Hillary home.

 

Copywrite 2007  -  Barry G.

 

 

MY BEAUTY SECRETS 

 by Janet Reno

 _________________________________________________

  

  

THINGS I LOVE ABOUT BILL

by Hillary Clinton 

  _________________________________

Sequel:

 

   THINGS I LOVE ABOUT HILLARY

By Bill Clinton 

  ___________________________________

 

MY LITTLE BOOK OF
PERSONAL HYGIENE

 by Osama Bin Laden   

  ___________________________________

 

THINGS I CANNOT AFFORD

by Bill Gates  

 

  ____________________________________

 

THINGS I WOULD NOT
DO FOR MONEY
by Dennis Rodman 

 

 __________________________________

 

AMELIA EARHART'S
GUIDE TO THE PACIFIC

 

 ___________________________________

 

  A COLLECTION of
MOTIVATIONAL SPEECHES
by Dr. J Kevorkian

 

__________________________________

 

ALL THE MEN I HAVE LOVED BEFORE

by Ellen Degeneres & Rosie O'Donnell

 

  ____________________________________

 

GUIDE TO DATING ETIQUETTE
by Mike Tyson

 

  __________________________________

 

THE AMISH PHONE DIRECTORY

 

_______________________________________

 

MY PLAN TO FIND THE REAL KILLERS
by O.J. Simpson

 _________________________________________

 

 

HOW TO DRINK & DRIVE OVER BRIDGES
by Ted Kennedy

 

 

Copywrite 2007  -  Barry G.

 

 

Convention agenda!

 

 

Sponsored by hairy armpits.

6:00 p.m. - Opening flag burning ceremony.
6:05 p.m.  Opening secular prayers by Rev. Jesse

Jackson and Rev. Al Sharpton.
6:30 p.m. - Anti-war concert by Barbra Streisand.
6:40 p.m. - Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
7:00 p.m. - Tribute theme to France.
7:10 p.m. - Collect offerings for al Zawahri defense fund.
7:25 p.m. - Tribute theme to Germany.
7:45 p.m. – Anti War rally (Moderated by Michael Moore)                          
8:25 p.m. - Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
8:30 p.m. - Terrorist appeasement workshop.
9:00 p.m. -Gay marriage ceremony (both male and female couples).
9:30.p.m. - * Intermission *
10:00.p.m. -Posting the Iraqi Colors by Sean Penn and Tim 

Robbins 

10:10 p.m. - Re- enactment of Kerry's fake medal toss. 

10:20.p.m. - Cameo by Dean 
'Yeeearrrrrrrg!'
10:30 p.m. - Abortion demonstration by N.A.R.A.L. 
10:40 p.m. - Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
10:50 p.m. - Pledge of allegiance to the UN.
11:00 p.m. - Multiple gay marriage ceremony (threesomes, mixed and
same sex). Rep. Barney Frank (D,Mass.), Sponsor

 

Barney Franks wet dream.

11:15 p.m. - Maximizing Welfare workshop.
11:30 p.m. - 'Free Saddam' pep rally.
11:59 p.m. - Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
12:00 p.m. - Nomination of democratic candidate.
 Any chance we could get Ted Kennedy to drive Hillary home from the convention?

 

 

How does Bill win these things?  How come no one is asking me to get laid?

 

 

I will never have to have sex with THAT woman again.

 

 

copywrite 2006 - Barry G.

 

 

 

 

Supposedly Bill was going to split his time between the CWI and bin laden.  Instead he sounded like a member of the cast of the view carping about Hillary.  All the while showing his pasty calves and tapping on poor innocent Chris Wallace.  Among Bill's gems:

First guy says, "My wife's an angel!"  Second guy remarks, "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.

A young son asked, "Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"

Dad replied, "That happens in every country, son." 

and of course the classic:

"Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"  Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."

Then Clinton had the nerve to say HE was shut down about what he came there to talk about.  I think he needs some friends and a bar.  Maybe Ted has some spare time.

You have no idea Chris of the crap I put up with from that woman, Mrs. Clinton.

 

copywrite 2006 - Barry G.

 

 

Apparently THIS woman

Granted the prior floozies were all several upgrades from Hillary...but this is a leap.  Is this the beginning of him pulling a John Kerry but landing a better looking Teresa Heinz?  Could Hillary be in for a primary fight against Bill of all people?  He is eligible to run again.

As potential girlfriends go, Belinda Stronach would rank as a true catch. She is single, youngish (she just turned 40), attractive, wealthy, impeccably well-connected and politically ambitious - glamorous in every respect. Two years ago, Time magazine listed her as one of the 100 most powerful people on the planet. The tabloids cut to the chase: they called her the "blonde bombshell" or "Bubba's blonde."

 

Dictator Chavez flew in for this momentous occasion.  Jello officials reasoned that since Cosby's image has been continually tarnished by casual sex, extramarital affairs and bastard children while Castro is recovering and eating pudding in bed. He even held up the day's paper in a picture for the press to show that he's really still alive.  Castro is just a more appealing person now and will increase pudding sales.

I will send you all the pudding you can eat mi amigo.

The amigos were also observed exchanging this "unknown device"

 

"I really believe I was put on Earth to do more than play basketball and stockpile money," Barkley said. "I really want to help people improve their lives, and what's left is for me to decide how best to do that."

Unlike Bill Gates, Barkley is sincere and speaks the type of english those of us who arent technogeeks understand. 

 

How sad is it that the left and other assorted idiots such as the aclu have distorted reality to the point where there is now a law to ALLOW the flying of the American Flag.  What BS.

WASHINGTON  — President Bush on Monday signed a bill that would bar condominium and homeowner associations from restricting how the American flag can be displayed.

Sponsored by Rep. Roscoe Bartlett, R-Md., the resolution would prohibit those groups from preventing residents from displaying an American flag on their own property.

It was passed unanimously by both the House and the Senate.

"Americans have long flown our flag as an expression of their appreciation for our freedoms and their pride in our nation," Bush said in a statement. "As our brave men and women continue to fight to protect our country overseas, Congress has passed an important measure to protect our citizens right to express their patriotism here at home without burdensome restrictions.

F U   aclu