a small dose of reality

Rules:  take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition

  Here are the winners:
  
  1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
  2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
  3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until  you realize it was your money to start with.
  4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
  5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright id eas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
  6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
  7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high 

  8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the   person who doesn't get it.
  9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
  10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
  11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)
  12. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
  13. Decafalon (n.): The gruelling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you
  14. Glibido: All talk and no action.
  15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
  16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
  17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
  18. Caterpallor (n.): The colour you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
  
  

Copywrite 2007  -  Barry G.

Bob Woodward, the columnist for The Washington Post who famously wrote, with fellow journalist Carl Bernstein, an exposé on Watergate, for which the source of secret info became known as Deep Throat, has just published a new exposé on administration missteps in Iraq. Appropriately enough, the new source is labeled Deep Tragedy.

While Deep Throat eventually revealed his identity, as S. Mark Felt, a highly placed official at the FBI, the identity of Deep Tragedy has already been revealed as S. Common Knowledge.

Deep Tragedy

The book, State of Denial, includes such tidbits as Bush saying, in November of 2003, “I don’t want anyone in the cabinet to say it is an insurgency. I don’t think we are there yet." He may not even think we’re there now.

In a promo interview on “60 Minutes," Woodward states that Henry Kissinger is advising the White House, which is common knowledge among the residents who live near the former secretary’s home and deal with the regular roar of entering and exiting helicopters.

He says Kissinger has advised Bush and Cheney that in Iraq “Victory is the only meaningful exit strategy.” Woodward goes on to infer that Kissinger is trapped in the past, which, it seems to us, offers little escape for anyone. "This is so fascinating. Kissinger's fighting the Vietnam War again because, in his view, the problem in Vietnam was we lost our will."

The book contains numerous other revelations of uncertainty and infighting in the Bush administration. Apparently, even George Bush’s dad was losing sleep, worrying about the invasion.

Yet it’s a bit late in the game for more finger-pointing. There’s just too much hindsight at play to lend much originality to even the most intrepid effort to get at the truth.

What is really needed is not stirring anew the pot of common knowledge but uncommon insight. Not continuing denial, but decisive acceptance. We must either convince the insurgents that their murderous tactics cannot win by decisive action against them or we should begin a well-gauged departure and leave them to bewail the state of their own self-maimed country.

copywrite 2006 - Barry G.

Thanks to a misprint, I am able to mail all my correspondence for free and at the same time get the word out.  Of course, the vast majority of the democrat left are too lazy to even register much less go to the polls.  The new immigrants/aliens are registered Republicans.  What type of party will replace the democrats and how soon? 

Is this too subliminal?

copywrite 2006 - Barry G.

This is straight out of one of the episodes.  Unfortunately Wayne Knight is going to face the wrath of the German penal system as a person not as an actor.

BERLIN (Reuters) - A Berlin postal worker who was caught with more than several thousand undelivered letters in his basement has admitted he was overwhelmed by the job but insisted he planned to deliver them soon.

Police recently found 90 boxes of post stacked in his basement. The postal worker, 36, identified as Thomas H., told Bild newspaper Friday he was only temporarily storing the post at his house and friends would help with delivery.

"There were just too much and I couldn't deliver it all by myself," he told the newspaper. Police said some of the letters found had been postmarked as early as April. The postal worker faces disciplinary action.

shalana millard is the name printed on her blog...no defamation of character there.  shalana millard admittedly deletes comments that disagree with her.  I am vexed to come up with a description for someone who behaves in this fashion.  Does anyone have any ideas?

Here is one: 

Any other ideas?